ASM 48-hour film fest screening!

Dudes!

I shot my first action fight sequence this weekend! In heels! Check it:

Alchemy in 10/8

Hee hee!

Almost through...

And can I just say?
Stupid Facebook.

Well...

...the storm has descended.

A little calm before the storm...

So here's what's up so far, Babies!

I just did a couple of staged readings last week (which is less stress in that you don't have to memorize your lines or the blocking, but infinitely more nerve-wracking because of how little preparation time you get. All you can do is to hope that your instincts are on). The awesomest (I know it's not a word---neener neener neener) was working on Harlem Duet by Djanet Sears. Not just because it's this incredibly written prelude to Shakespeare's Othello, and not just because I got to play the central character, Othello's first (black) wife. But that was a big part of it. It was like playing a black Medea, except without murdering the children. At least, not intentionally. But best of all, I got to act opposite some of my favourite actors in town. What a treat. Which is not to say that it wasn't agony at times. I put too much pressure on myself.

I will start teaching at Concordia again in June, which is tres swell. It's nice to teach (sort of) adults for a change. I'm thinking about making my focus voice work this time around. We'll see what kind of group I'll be with.

But there's more!
Apparently I'm a glutton for punishment and so I accepted to be on the Fringe jury again this year. A whirlwind of shows in ten days, trying to separate the wheat from the chaff, and yet not to get sucked into the vortex that is the beer tent, and then have something more or less relevant to say about what I've seen when it comes time for selection. The toughest part of the jury is leaving your friends at the beer tent to see a show that is shite, but you have to sit through it anyway. Thank the Lord I can see the shows for free. It really is the only consolation.

It also allows me to have an excuse to say nothing if I didn't particularly enjoy the show: "Sorry, I can't really talk about it. I'd love to give you feedback you know, but I can't..." *wink!wink!* Thank the Lord. At least noone's feelings get hurt. I'm an appalling liar when it comes to crap shows.

And YouthWorks has just slowed down for the next couple of weeks. Now it's time to write up the grants (blech) and prepare the summer programs. I also secretly hope to somehow save up enough money to escape to an island for at least a week in August. That would be choice!

And of course, there is also the super duper excitement of being cast in the Segal Centre for Performing Arts season opening of Inherit the Wind! I'll be playing Rachael Brown. (which is also my cousin's name, funnily enough) So here's a first for me: at the Segal centre, and I'm cast as a romantic lead. Really? No hookers? Single mothers? What about the maid? No? Not even a little? What a refreshing change. There may be hope yet for this town. In fact, what's even more awesome is that the part wasn't written for a black woman. Which is a big deal for the Segal Centre. That doesn't happen often unless you're somebody with clout like Tyrone Benskin. How much do I love my director, Greg Kramer? Lots. Uh huh.

There are other thngs on the burner, but after the repeated and persistent pain of anticipating and then losing out on auditions and other projects (from now on, we no longer refer to that musical by name, but whose initials are Dreamgirls...d'oh!) I'll hold those ones close to my chest until contracts are signed or at the very least I'm in rehearsal.

I know I've neglected you, and I'm sorry. When I'm not busy with work, the moment I slow down, all of the most recent flu and cold bugs catch up with me. But I still love you, and think of you often. I just can't (or am too tired) to do anything about it. I always appreciate your patience and the fact that you stick with me, even when I don't deserve it. I gotta tell ya, I have super friends and family. Which is what keeps me going.

Loving you!

An exciting year ahead

I can't even begin to tell you. Mainly because I'm so sleepy. But you'll hear about it...oh very yes.

Honestly...

I haven't got much to say, I feel guilty for not posting in ages, and I can't sleep, so...lucky you!

...and this false alertness is going to get me into trouble, I can feel it. It's probably something like the drunk n' dial phenomenon. Here's hoping I don't write something retarded.

Anyway, I was AWOL (again) because I was directing the School Tour production this year, and I've never directed professionally before, so I was a wee bit of a basketcase. Happily, I didn't hurt anybody, the play is being well-received in the schools and hurray I didn't wreck anything. So that's really good news. Now I find myself mentally and creatively exhausted, which probably won't last much longer than another week. In the meantime, life is feeling a little bit like sleepwalking. But whatevs, I'm starting to learn that it's just part of my creative cycle. Either I'm plugged in, or I'm not.

Yeah, and now we're getting to the dangerous stage of insomnia when I think that I'm being all deep and philospohical, but in reality I'm rambling incoherently.

I'm out!

The Ultimate Poutine

This is a poutine for foodies.
I had originally called it the 007:Quantum of Solace Poutine because it's that sexy, but I'm open to name suggestions.
I just tested it, and it's pretty doggone awesome. I can't tell you quantities, because what's the point? I have no idea what they are. Anyway, it's up tp you to decide how much of each flavour you want in there.

Layer the ingredients in this order:

awesome fries (I use oven baked wedges, but whatever floats your boat. If I had the choice, it would be those deep-fried chewy sweet fries, but anyway. It's too messy to make at home)
sauteed chicken breast (I marinated them in olive oil, cayenne pepper, garlic, tamari, and a little worcestershire) with white wine and mushrooms
cheese curds
caramelized onions
peppercorn sauce (I had good results with Knorr green peppercorn sauce)
crumbled bacon

Gentlemen, start your engines.

Back in the saddle again...

Howdy y'all!

Now that the show has been over for awhile I've been able to concentrate on my other jobs, which are essentially only at Black Theatre Workshop. YouthWorks is a good program, but the enrollment is a scandal, and straight up heartbreaking. But we're hustling to get things going. I sometimes worry that I'm going to get fired, but then I think to myself, who else would do this job at my salary? No, I think the greatest concern is hanging on to the funding for the program. And getting more funding to be able to better advertise and afford awesome guest teachers.

And the preparation for the School tour play is underway, which is awesome. I've finished most of the research for the playwright and just have to send him two more things today and then wait for the updated script. I've got my cast, got my team, we're working on the design, and now I'm just trying to find a time that everybody can get together to workshop this thing.

And I've just started working out again. It's been awhile. To tell the truth, once I quit working at the gym, I didn't want to see the inside of another gym for a little while. But what can I say? Besides the shocking arrival of what appears to be cellulite, the gym three minutes away from BTW and 12 minutes away from my house made me a membership offer I couldn't refuse. So now, Mike and I are training most days, and I am sore as heck. And I'm broke again, but at least I'll be pretty!

This no doubt makes me really immature

...but I fully dig that Nicolas Archambault fella from So You Think You Can Dance Canada. Like, fully.

Howdy!

Well, the show is finally over, and it was a success, I think. I'm glad things went well, and the company has garnered some more respect in the community, which is pretty awesome, I think. I'm very proud of Mike. Man, if I had half of this guy's ambition and energy when I was his age...
Anyway, I got some complimentary reviews "beautiful," and "sparkling live-wire". Hilarious.

I think that the thing which is most gratifying to me on a personal level is the sense that finally I am making a place for myself in this theatre community. I mean, three successful shows this year and now this directing gig with an absolute dream team of actors and designers. I've noticed that people are starting to treat me differently, like I actually live here instead of just being a visitor. Which is, when you think about it, a colossal load of bollocks. I mean what is this little theatre community in Montreal anyway? It ain't the West End or Broadway.

It's not so much the notoriety that matters for its own sake, it's the prospect that doors continue to open up for me to keep working and doing projects that I love. And to tell the truth, I'd like my work to be enjoyed and appreciated by discerning folk. More than that just seems risky. I'm aware of my insecurities, and I think that beyond a certain level of success, that it would become almost dangerous for me. How could I not turn into a complete and utter asshat? I don't think anyone's immune to that particular risk.

I remember talking to Mike about ambition. He's aiming for the stratosphere, this one. Success, and glory and all that. I just want to work, make a decent living, make some great art, and make in difference in people's lives with it. You know, to become an incredible acting teacher and to help others be successful. (It's not that noble when you take into account that I'm scared of too much suceess.) But it seems that because I don't reach as far as Mike, I'm not advancing along that path as much as he is. I want the moon, he wants the stars, and so he's already at the moon while I'm on the roof.
That probably made no sense whatsoever. Bof.
Je vous aime, Bebes!

Only three more shows!

Hey hey, Kids!

As of Monday, no more clearing dirt out of my lungs every night! I'll sleep more! The show is going really well, better than I expected. It looks like Mike's big gamble has paid off!

Anyway, I need to go nap, we've got two shows today and I'd like to not suck.
Je vous aime, Bébés!

Why has this only occurred to me now?

So, it's Thanksgiving weekend, and I worked through pretty much all of it. (Except for Saturday, which I apparently slept through.) I haven't yet taken a moment to think of the things for which I'm grateful. Number one are definitely the people I love, who inexplicably love me back. But hey, I'll take it and a side of fries, thank you very much.

And I want to continue on this edifying and healthy train of thought, but at the moment I'm too tired and sick to do it. Darn it, I'm going to the clinic tomorrow. There's a nasty bout of strep throat going around the cast and for the first time today my throat is suspiciously sore. I will also get my wrists checked out and see if I can get anything to help me sleep at nights because I'm having a lot of nightmares.

Uh, grateful, grateful! I still have a job for now! I'm more healthy than unhealthy, my roommate is a good person and good to me, I get to act for a living, I'm going to direct a professional play, and the future is full of possibilities, I have a nephew! I just gotta keep my head above water and not dwell on the bad stuff.

I hope that wherever you are and whatever's going on with you, that you keep your head up.

Question...

(by the way, didn't get the part.)

So my question is this: If my hands are numb or sometimes tingly for hours on end, is that a bad thing?

AIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guess who has an audition in Toronto this Monday?
And guess what show it's for?

DREAMGIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh please, oh please, oh PLEASE pray hard for me; send me your good vibes and good wishes, and if they could be timed to kick somewhere between 2:45 pm and 5pm this coming Monday that would be stellar.

Believe it or not...

I've actually got a date this coming Saturday!
Keep an eye out for headlines proclaiming that pigs are now capable of flight.



Oh, also:

I'm allowed to laugh about this because of my Asian heritage! The unfair double standard lives on!

Makes me wanna holler...

I gotta tell you, today I'm not very happy with my city. Don't get me wrong, Montreal is gorgeous, it's a warm, sunny day, I'm off work early and enjoying a lovely chicken salad sandwich that I made. My voice is slowly healing, and I'm pretty darn healthy, if a little overweight. I'm going to direct an amazing play for the School Tour at BTW. Perhaps it's more a question of not being happy with people today. 

I've been reading some local community papers discussing the Fredy Villanueva shooting by police. I've been thinking about accomodements raisonnables, I've been thinking about the funding cuts in the arts sector. And I'm livid. What angers me is a wanton disregard for humanity, for "the other" in our society. Which touches me nearly because that's a cross-section of the population that I identify most with: that which is not the mainstream, the majority. And I gotta tell you, it's hard not to take this mess personally. Because I've been harassed by the police for living, my image is trivialized and caricaturized by colleagues in blackface during work parties at the gym, (although I'm unreasonable for taking offense); the government is slashing funding for arts programs and my kids and I can't catch a break.

So I've decided to practice what a very wise friend and colleague of mine said to me a few years back when I was going through my separation and divorce: put it in the work. Well, I'm going to. And I won't pull any punches.  The kids will love it; the teachers... watch out.

The walking wounded

Dudes, I have made a new discovery: When you are really, really tired, from lack of sleep or training too hard, you tend to get injured a lot, for stupid random stuff. This is the week I'm having right now. I've begun biking to and from work for the past week, and the stupid thing has bitten me countless times. My legs and arms are full of scratches. I bump into doorframes, bang my hip against tables as I walk by, drop stuff on my toes, and burn myself on hot cookware or the oven. The latest? This morning in the shower, as I looked up to rinse my face, the showerhead fell on my nose. I saw stars, yo. And then I panicked. My face is my fortune! (and believe me, I can't afford any drop in revenue.) Thankfully nothing is broken, but now I really feel like I'm back in the schoolyard when I used to scrap all the time.

Enough is enough!

No more hosing around! The whole point of keeping a blog in the first place was so that I would be able to keep in touch with amigos of mine and let them know what's the 411 in my life, since I'm afflicted with a retarded schedule (or tunnel vision, take your pick). So, although I actually have been really busy and have had limited computer access, to be perfectly honest, I haven't been feeling the "sharing vibe". Which, if you know me well, you also know that it happens periodically. I go AWOL. But hopefully, if you're still my friend after all this time, then you understand this about me and we can just pick up where we left off.

Okey dokey, here's what's up:

When I finally got back to Montreal, even though I knew I would be moving out of my apartment five days later, I couldn't actually bring myself to do anything except loaf around on the

SOFA OF DOOM

and watch DVDs. The coolest thing was watching the Bourne Identity trilogy and see all of the places I visited. That was pretty darn cool. I ate a lot of delivery food. A lot. I figured that I had one last chance at a truly slothful, debauched, lazy session without guilt, and so I took it. Since I knew I was going to once again have a roommate, I knew I'd feel really self-conscious about spending hours of time eating junk food and watching movies. Particularly since my roommate is such an industrious, together kind of person. And it was an awesome time (and blah blah, it also gave me some time to cope with jet lag) just being with me. I hadn't gotten to spend that much time on my own while on vacation-besides, it's just rude to abandon one's travel companions just because one happens to be a loner by nature.

The downside to all of that of course, is that I scrambled like a madwoman to get my stuff packed and ready to move. Which resulted in me basically only have the bare minimum of things ready to go. Yes indeed, over the course of the next month, it got really feng shui up in my apartment with some serious clutter clearing. I think I got rid of 1/3 of my belongings and clothing. Since I was moving into a furnished apartment, I had to be ruthless about what I would keep, what I would put in storage, and what I would throw away. But hurray, it finally all got done, and now I live in an awesome apartment ten minutes away from Black Theatre Workshop and Twenty minutes away from the gym. On foot, no less. And my apartment is so pretty!

And so is my roommate for that matter, but she also just happens to be a very cool human being with a great heart. I couldn't have chosen a better roommate for myself. It's funny, I knew her from theatre school, but she was a year ahead of me, so we never really hung out that much before she started living with Quincy last year. Truth be told, I was a bit intimidated by her at the time, and over the years, even though we both have very close friends in common, we never really connected. (Fun fact: Paula Jean happens to be my favourite stage actress! Which, when you think about it, is like living with Cate Blanchett or something.) Yeah, I was a little in awe of her for the first two weeks.

So although I am a selfish girl with strong hermitty tendencies, I've managed to find a happy medium of being social and involved, but also still having time to retreat and be with myself. And now my bedroom has become a sanctuary of awesomeness, for whenever I want to have a perfectly lazy Sunday. I mean, even though they say you should never do anything in your room except sleep, I've got my TV and DVD in there, and I gotta tell you, as much as I love the

SOFA OF DOOM

(now located in my new apartment, utterly devouring all will for independent movement
in a whole new generation of unwary visitors---the carnage continues)

I have found a new love: bigger, better, and sexier:

THE BOTTOMLESS BED!!!!

Oh yes, darlings, I'm taking my sloth to a whole 'nother level. It's so awesome, I can't even talk about it yet. I've just about worked out the perfect setup for this. The only thing that could make it even more perfect would be to get one of those rolling trays like they have in the hospital. Yeah. That would be sweeeeet. Reading, watching movies, sleeping, AND eating, all in one place? Absolute heaven.

As for dating and relationships: don't ask. Nothing, nothing, NOTHING on the horizon, beyond doing the rounds with some newly acquired male friends and making sure that for them, nookie is not the underlying motivation for befriending me. But I gotta tell you, I like my life right now and I really enjoy the freedom of being single, I've always enjoyed my own company immensely. It would take a rather compelling individual to get me to alter my schedule. But I don't ask for much beyond a connection: just be nice to me, don't cheat, and don't hit. Hmm, seems pretty low maintenance of me, and maybe that's not a good thing. It's not like I don't have standards (because I do, believe you me), it's just that I don't think that I require a lot from a potential partner, is all. Or maybe what seems simple to me is actually a difficult thing to do. Anyway, blah blah blah, in the meantime, I'll just be getting on with my life.

I'm taking the year off singing while my nodes heal, because I don't want to have to have surgery. Happily, they've been diagnosed before they've gotten too severe, but I've got some major changes to make in my lifestyle, let me tell you. Anyway, I've got an appointment with the speech therapist in August. And I need to actually go pick up my prescriptions (but I'm broke, and I don't have insurance-crap). But hey, one step at a time. I've already cut out coffee, I've cut back on smoking and will start on the patch at the end of the week, and if all goes well, I won't need to have surgery. Once this summer intensive is over, I can get back into training on a regular basis, and then I'll do a great big detox! It's time to start taking care of me a little better, because I'm willing to give up a lot of things, but singing isn't one of them. If everything goes according to plan, by the end of the fall my voice should be back to normal.

And let me tell you what else is going on with this life of mine! We're in the midst of the summer intensive at BTW, which is going well, although enrollment is still down. I'm hoping that we can get numbers up over the course of the year, by switching up the format of the workshop. Classes are going well, it's a long day for me, starting at the gym at 6 in the morning, and then going straight to BTW to teach.

I just recently got cast in the English premiere of Lion in the Streets by Judith Thompson. The play runs from October 22-November 2. There will be elements of dance involved as well, which I'm looking forward to doing. I need challenges. Apparently, the play has never been done with as large of a cast as we are (generally, the actors play multiple roles) and for the first time, the lead character (a 9 year-old Portuguese girl) will actually be played by a young Portuguese child! Which is pretty intense, if you know anything about the play.

And although I haven't yet signed a contract, I've been asked to direct the School Tour production of Skin for BTW. It's so exciting, because I've only ever directed children up until now and I'm looking forward to directing professionals. I think communication will go a lot more smoothly. And it's my first professional directing gig!

Today, I'm feeling really ill, and have hit the mid-point slump (with regards to my level of fatigue) in the summer workshop. It's a challenge to remain patient and to take my time with the students.

I just saw The Dark Knight. Good flickin' movie! Heath Ledger is where it's at, Baby!
And I finally heard the latest cd by Ben Harper and the Innocent Criminals, and Al Green. Amazing, simply amazing. I love that happy swoon I get when music is really good and speaks to my soul. It's what I had always imagined love at first sight would feel like. (If it ever happens, I'll be sure to compare notes.)

Here's love and a kiss for you: *m'wah!*
Don't be a stranger...

London, London, London!

Oh man, there's so much to tell you all about this trip, but since I'm back at Lianne's with a moment to get online, it would be very rude for me to stay on the computer for much longer. But let me at least tell you about some of the places I've seen!

We started in London, and then flew to Parma where we rented a car and travelled to Milan. Let me tell you, there are some mighty skinny women in that town, I'm talking matchsticks on high heels, but anyway. And it is true, Italians are beautiful, and the men sure do appreciate women. My little ego has been boosted, I can tell you. And the Duomo cathedral is apparently the 3rd largest in the world and took 600 years to build. It's hard to believe people can construct things like that. Absolutely gorgeous.
I'm having a blast with Mom, she's a lot of fun. The best part of this trip is getting to spend time with her, and considering how amazing this trip is, that's saying a lot.

Then after we went to Milan, we went to Venice, which was stunning. I mean, it's like seeing a 1950's starlet, sure she's getting on in years, but boy, she's still got it. You know what I mean? After that, we went to Tuscany and stayed in this village called Tavarnelle, which has records dating its existence back to 780 B.C. It is easily the most beautiful country I have ever seen or imagined, and no pictures can prepare you for it. Afterwards we went on to Pisa, and of course saw the tower, but the real treasure is the Cathedral. I don't even have words for it. I was so overwhelmed, I actually wept. I really get why Italians have so much national pride, and why so many of the greatest artists come from there. The natural beauty of the country offers a lot of inspiration.

Afterwards, we went to Cinque Terre and chilled at the beach for a couple of days (I've got a bit of a tan-hooray!)

And then there was Paris. Whoa. I saw everything you could possibly see on foot in 13 hours, and believe me, it's incredible! I went to the Louvre and saw the permanent collection (Mona Lisa, Venus de Milo, etc.) and it's very powerful when you see them for yourself. There was so much to see in town, and I can't wait to come back. I think if anything could motivate me to take saving money seriously, it would be the prospect of returning to Paris to spend a week just walking and exploring. Also, I met Aaron Eckhart-well, bumped into him on the street. He posed for a picture with me and was very sweet about it all.

Now I'm back in London at Lianne's house. Last night, we went down to the pub and enjoyed fish and chips, irish stew, potato & leek soup with soda bread (all homemade). And I had Black Velvets. I met these great people originally from Ireland and we chatted outside, talking about travel, and all kinds of things. They said they liked London because everybody didn't know your business like they do back home.

I'm going to be really sad to leave Lianne and Mom when I go back home, but I'm also looking forward to seeing everybody. Man, it's been awesome being on vacation. Now I get why people have them.

I'll be moving closer downtown next month, which means more sleep! Hooray! Anyway, I gotta go. Bisous to all of you (well, to you if you're the only one reading this, then.)
Ciao 4 now!

Latest updates

Hiya Peeps!

I've got one foot out the door, I mean I'm this close to leaving for a three week vacation to Europe. Man, it's so good to be spoiled. I'm gonna see Brownie in London, because she's got a mini-Kernan growing in her belly. Pretty nifty.

Anyhoo, 7 Stories was a great success, I had loads of fun. I didn't get called back for the Centaur show, but I'm not stressing about it. I had my best audition so far, and I believe that it won't be without effect. It just may have to be later rather than sooner. Oh well.

I got many plans and things coming up, but I guess I won't talk about them until they happen. I don't know why. Oh. Probably because it sucks when plans fall through and then I have to tell everybody all about it. Yeah, that would be the reason why. Anyhow, once I get back in June, I think I may start blogging a little more regularly. I may not, but I'd like to.

I actually have to get a move on, I'm going to see a play at Centaur, and then I have to hustle back to BTW to prepare for the advanced class' outcome performance tonight. Last night, the intermediate students did their thing. And then all I have left to do are some administrative type things before I leave on Saturday.

Hurray for me! I'll miss you, but not enough to stay here!

Also, I thought this picture was funny. The caption was:

Hey, that's not creamer!